GOT BOOST?

Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline

If you are obsessive-compulsive.... please press 1 repeatedly

If you are co-dependant.... please ask someone to press 2

If you have multiple personalities.... press 3, 4, 5 and 6

If you are paranoid-delusional.... we know who you are and what you want
Just stay on the line while we trace the call

If youa re schizophrenic.... listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press

If you are manic-depressive... it doesn't matter which number you press, nobody will answer